Well I've had a beautiful day today and I'm still having it, in fact.
You can tell that simply by the fact that I'm 'publishing' this, as wordpress would have it. (always seems to grand perhaps, or something, somehow inappropriate: 'publishing'. I'm publishing nothing. I just write on my computer and press a key.
Anyway. It has been beautiful and I realise I never, ever make blog posts or even emails or FB posts etc. that declare such a fact. Never.
And nor does anyone else. In my experience.
But I have endless amounts of beautiful days. I've had millions of them. Bit of poetic license there, I'm not quite that old yet. But you know what I mean.
I've had far, far, far more good days than I've ever had bad days.
And that's by the 'grace of god'. For I've done little to arrange things so's good days will result. Quite the contrary in fact. Quite the contrary.
I am sorry that the world is full of so much suffering. The older I get the more I realise the truth of that. Sometimes it seems like that is all that I learn: more and more about the ubiquity and myriad aspects, manifestions of hurt, harm.
I am sorry. I don't think it was my doing. Reality is so mysterious perhaps in some way it was. In some tiny specific ways here and there it quite definitely was: I have done harm. Well. Haven't we all.
Convenient 'mitigation' for me.
But the big picture. The horrible truth. The suffering of so many all across the world.
I didn't do that.
I feel guilty for being so happy. For having it so good. I just can't express it. How good I've had it. All my life. All my life. I have had the most wonderful life I can imagine. I'm still having it.
Perhaps in the privacy of their own minds, just as I'm in the privacy of mine, most everyone in the world is coming to the same conclusion.
That seems impossible to me when I look out on the world.
Totally and absolutely impossible.
But it is the only straw of hope that I have.
And I can't say any more. I've run out of inspiration.
Where was I? Oh, yes. I just wanted to say: I have it good. I have it great.
And I love it. And always have. With all my ups and downs.
Really. I love. I thank god for it. Really. I do.
And I wish for everyone to enjoy what I enjoy.